"It's just a sweet, sweet fantasy, baby..."
Come on. We know you know all of the words. After all, there's perhaps no music industry legend (and well, she is a legend) with a Cinderella story quite like the likes of Mariah Carey's—it's the kind of thing our generation of cringe-y YouTube webcam cover singers essentially dreams of. What, you don't know? Let us catch you up to speed: after she slipped him a demo tape at a party, record exec Tommy Mottola spent two weeks desperately searching for her; upon which he finally signed her to Columbia Records (we'd likely prefer a glass Margiela slipper, but whatever). The rest is history—one that spans a marriage and divorce to and from her one-time Prince Charming, hospitalization, an Inaugural Ball, American Idol gig, babies (make that twins named Monroe (after Marilyn, duh!) and Moroccan, Nick Cannon, and a whole lotta slow jams and body-con dresses. Oh yeah, and Glitter; lots and lots of glitter.
Say what you want about Mimi—for all of her over-the-top theatricality, she seems entirely self-aware, and actually embraces and play ups her diva rep and more grandoise moments. Do you really think the whole stepping out in a bedazzled sling thing isn't done sans a bit of a thought? And besides, it's not as if Carey lacks the chops to back it up—did we mention girl has the World Record for? Seriously. Think about that for a second.
And so on the eve of her fourteenth studio album, The Art of Letting Go, we figured it would be fitting that a little tip of the hat was due. Name us one girl who says she can resist belting out a little, "We Belong Together" or that interlude on "Always Be My Baby" and we'll show you a liar; we can't, however, speak to the number of adult beverages involved, of course. Now excuse us—we need a moment.